Mutant Viewing: Raiders of the Lost Ark

Raiders of the Lost Ark

There’s nothing like a sick day for kicking back, popping in a movie, and coughing along with one of your favourite all time movies. Today PoolMan takes us all along for a Mutant Viewing of the immortal Raiders of the Lost Ark!

Snakes… why’d it have to be snakes?!?

0:10 Not a bad dissolve from the Paramount mountain to the real one… I hear they searched for a while to find a mountain that looked like that.

0:36 Alfred Molina follows the silent Dr Jones into the cave. Who would EVER believe that Indy’s traitorous guide, Satipo, would go on to become Doc Ock?

1:28 You gotta adore the native uncovering the statue and just running off screaming. This was all so safe until we unearthed that damned statue!

2:07 Best way to check for poison; taste it.

2:39 Interesting how Indy pretty much ignores his guides… it’s almost like they’re following him. In which case, why bring the guides along? Ah yes, body count.

3:10 First crack of the whip, and Indy disarms one of the guides as the gun comes out. It’s a nice way to intro a character who will eventually be known as one of the most macho dudes in all moviedom.

3:55 Watch that bag of sand.

4:46 Arachnophobes beware, two spiders on Indy. And (quick pause to try and count) about two DOZEN on Molina. Shalen dances happily somewhere knowing all the tarantulas are nice and warm.

5:20 So the ancients knew how to build solar sensitive rocks? At least we know what happened to Indy’s competitor.

6:22 I think they went a little overboard gradually revealing Indy from shadows. They’ve done it half a dozen times so far.

6:55 “Stay here.” “If you insist, Senor.” Nice.

7:30 And now, one of the most famous scenes in movie history. Indy rubs his cheek and tries to guess how much the little gold idol weighs. Measures out the sand… and does the swap!

8:07 Oh, that doesn’t sound good. Time to run!

8:37 Oh, you thievin’ little…

8:53 I always love how Indy looks satisfied that he’s about to be safe, just before it gets worse. Oh, and don’t forget your whip! You’ll be needing that!

9:24 And here comes the Giant Ball of Doom. Whether you love or hate this movie (and let’s be honest, how could you hate it?), EVERYBODY knows this scene. It’s iconic. It’s one of those things they roll out at Academy Award time to put in a montage about how great film is. Indiana Jones outrunning the giant stone ball as it rolls behind him is as amazing as it gets in action movies, and you’ll never convince me otherwise.

9:44 Aaaaaand straight into the fire. Here comes Belloq and the natives. Too bad you don’t speak Hovitos!

11:20 Indy running over the hill with all the natives behind him is the first real laugh in this flick. For as serious and action packed as it can be, Indy packs a lot of good laughs, too.

12:23 Beware of trouser snakes!

12:56 And here we have Dr Jones, back at the university. There is no way you can’t find all the girls staring mooneyed at Indy hilarious. Do you think any of the gals learned anything?

13:52 LOVE YOU. Wonder how she wrote that on her eyes to begin with…

14:30 Marcus would end up becoming a great character, but he’s just not as much fun as he’ll eventually become.

15:34 “Obtainer of rare antiquities”. I’d love to put that on my business card.

16:25 The Nazis obsessed with the occult… that sounds good!

17:11 Here comes the exposition! Talking about Moses bringing down the stone tablets with the Commandments, the Ark, etc. Hope everyone’s taking notes!

19:54 “Good God!” “Yes, that’s just what the Hebrews thought.”

20:20 And finally, after three whole minutes of nothing but people talking, we get to the point. The Ark will supposedly make any army invincible. Thank goodness we finally got that out.

20:50 Interesting we get a view of Indy’s home. Seems a smallish affair, but cool.

22:00 Shades of Han Solo as Indy talks about not believing in hocus pocus.

22:31 Why is Indy’s hat grey here?

22:45 Look out, it’s a Nazi! I wonder how he got on the plane without being detected… we know later his accent is quite noticeable.

23:15 The first glimpse at the famous “plane flying over a map with a red line” shot. Classic.

23:30 I always thought this was a great way to introduce Marion as not just another damsel in distress. Having her win the drinking game was a stroke of genius. Plus, let’s be honest, Karen Allen was H-A-W-T.

24:30 Nice touch, the way the drunk’s fingers have to search for the glass. Followed by him passing out with that grin on his face…

27:14 Indy travels with $3000 in his pocket? That’s a lot of money today, let alone in 1936.

28:07 She was wearing it the whole time. Figures. I really like Marion’s character. THERE’S a tough woman in film. Sensitive, but no pushover.

29:05 “We… we are… not thirsty.” I love the nervous laugh on TOHT.

30:20 Okay, the sight of the hot poker makes ME cringe.

31:11 Indy sure gets a lot of shots out of that revolver, doesn’t he?

31:30 This sure is a violent flick, isn’t it? Couldn’t make this today, too many people might be offended! Wusses.

32:05 “Whiskey?” Bang!

32:36 Does anybody else think TOHT looks like Wallace Shawn when he goes for the amulet?

33:35 I never noticed this before… Marion ups the price on the amulet outside the bar. Indy offered her $3000, and she says until she gets her $5000 back, they’re partners. Hm.

34:16 SALLAH! I love Sallah! John Rhys Davies’ best role until he becomes a dwarf, for sure!

36:16 Indy’s SECOND warning that the Ark is not meant for man’s possession. Think he’s paying attention?

37:09 Aw, the monkey knows how to zieg heil. Ain’t it adorable? That must be awkward in the wrong company.

38:18 The market fight. I never really noticed how slapsticky this fight kind of is. Lots of unintentional hits, visual gags… action packed, but kind of funny, too.

39:15 I love the guy they got to threaten Marion with the knife. Nice teeth, Chuckles.

39:37 Now we have the straw baskets bit. Marion hides in one basket, and Nobody can quire keep straight which it is.

40:13 The legendary swordsman, whom Indy just shoots. I laugh every single time I see this one. Yeah, we all know the old Harrison Ford got diarrhea story, but nothing anyone could have written would have been better than just blasting down the swordsman.

41:35 Enough explosives on that truck? When it rolls over, you can see the piece of phone pole they used to roll it sticking out of the bottom.

42:34 Is that a plastic cup Indy’s drinking out of?

44:25 Interesting how Belloq insinuates that he and Indy are so similar. More interesting how Indy reacts to it… it really does seem to bother him!

45:20 “It’s a radio for speaking to God.” Okaaaaaaaay.

45:40 Saved by the kids. The audience should find that funny, but why are all the gunmen laughing?

47:15 Look out! He put Tabasco on the dates!

49:03 “They’re digging in the wrong place!” I always want Sallah to finish the song. “I am the monarch of the sea…”

50:30 Interesting. In the scene where Indy has the amulet’s inscriptions translated, the old man says it should be six kadams (I’m sure I’m misspelling that) high, which Sallah suggests is 72 inches. That means a kadam is a foot. The back of the amulet says take back one kadam, so the staff should be five feet tall. Here we see Indy with a staff that’s taller than he is. Obviously, Indiana Jones is only 4 feet tall. Who knew?

51:56 Anybody else ever play Mastermind as a kid? The pegboard in the map room always reminds me of that. By the way, why is it still covered in sand? I thought the Germans had already used it several times.

53:14 Maybe the Ark’s buries in the Washington Monument, there.

53:58 Oooooooh… neat lens flare!

54:27 I’ll just break the staff… that’ll prevent them knowing how long it was!

55:55 Indy puts the gag back on Marion. Yow, that’s taking chances with your love life, man. Definite “sleeping on the couch” material there.

57:30 Why is Toht’s burn in colour?

57:50 This shot establishes very firmly that the real dig location is in plain view of the Nazi dig. And yet, we see Indy abandon his disguise in the next shot as the dig continues in the sunset.

59:34 Watch your toes there, Sallah.

59:50 Indy looks just a little crazed in the lightning, don’t he?

60:40 “Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes?” “Asps. Very dangerous. You go first.” Quite possibly the best line in a movie, ever.

61:51 Why oh why does Belloq have a lacy white dress in the middle of the desert? No really, what makes a French archaeologist hired by Nazis come to the desert with fine fashion?

62:28 Okay, confession time. As a kid, the shot of Marion taking off her bra in the mirror was probably the most exciting part of the movie for me. As a kid. Heh.

63:33 The monocled cobra, hood and all, is one intimidating looking snake. Even with the glass in between it and Indy.

64:08 Indy’s obviously an animal lover. He torches the snakes as fast as he possibly can. The ASPCA called, they’d like to talk to you. Of course, who knows how the snakes are even alive in the first place?

65:00 Never, NEVER get sucked into a drinking contest by someone who can obviously beat you. Even if it’s a girl half your body weight.

67:02 If it’s Belloq’s family wine, why is there Arabic on the label? Wait, might be Hebrew… hm.

67:50 Nobody ever made a coat hanger look so terrifying before. That’s awesome.

68:38 At long last, our first glimpse of the Ark. That really does look remarkable.

70:00 Finally, Belloq sees the second dig site. Took you long enough!

71:09 “Hahahahaaaaa… son of a bitch…”

71:27 Pretty risqué camera angle there, Marion!

74:00 Shouldn’t be hard to push the statue over… it’s already wobbling by the time Indy’s on top of it.

74:58 Where’s all the shrieking coming from?

75:14 Okay, the snake coming out of the corpse’s mouth… THAT’S creepy.

76:46 That is the BIGGEST mechanic I’ve ever seen.

77:18 I love the look of resignation on Indy’s face as realizes he’s really going to have to fight this behemoth. Oh, and the wobble on his legs when the giant hits him is priceless.

78:00 If you can’t fight fair, fight dirty. That’s what I say. Here’s mud, er, sand in your eye!

79:05 Okay, Marion on the guns is apparently a wee bit dangerous.

80:15 EW. Bald men and airplane props do not mix.

81:25 Turns out they’re shipping it by truck, not plane. God, it sucks being an action hero sometimes.

82:05 There really isn’t much left of Marion’s dress, is there?

83:25 The Nazis sure are clever. The jeep gunner nearly kills all the men in the truck.

83:58 The Nazi who falls off the back of the truck does the Wilhelm, the world famous scream that appears in nearly every George Lucas film since Star Wars.

84:12 Teehee… I’d probably make a face like that if I fell onto the hood of a truck, too. Anybody else think this guy looks like a Wayans brother?

85:35 It’s a looooong way down off that cliff.

86:00 Indy’s pretty good at knocking all the Germans off the truck at this point, and he’s plainly enjoying it. But he finally takes a slug in the arm.

86:45 There’s still one guy left in the back of the truck?!? What’s he been doing this whole time? Nice combover, by the way… bet you’re sorry the hat blew off.

87:20 This sequence (with Indy on the grill of the truck) is brilliant. Just one more of my favouriate stunts of all time. Under the truck, whip in place, behind the truck (dragging of course), back around the side, and through the door, just so he can put the other guy in exactly the same place. And under the tires he goes.

89:26 So who arranged for the entire market to cover for Indy when he gets back into town.

89:47 Hey, I never noticed this either! When the seller offers the Nazi a melon, the Nazi throws it over the car door. What I never caught before is the sound of a poor little doggy getting hit with it. Monty Python’s cat beating may have met its match!

90:12 “Mr Katenga!” *Spit*. Nice.

91:44 Heh, Marion is whistling the song Sallah sang when she kissed him.

92:11 HAHAHA… the mirror in the face gag cracks me up every last time I see it.

92:34 “It’s not the years, honey. It’s the mileage.”

93:33 Do you think Indy would have pointed out any other spots that “didn’t hurt” if he hadn’t fallen asleep?

94:14 How exactly do you get a rat to freak out on cue like that?

97:33 I sure hope the U-boat doesn’t, oh, I don’t know, SUBMERGE during the trip to the island.

98:20 A secret Nazi island base! These guys are everywhere! So how does Indy get off the sub and into hiding with a base full of Nazis watching before the sub even stops moving?

99:18 What’s with the hat on the Nazi to the right? Is that a bandage?

99:52 Love how the hat pops up when Indy smacks the officer.

100:40 Hm. Indy in full Nazi regalia. Interesting. Takes a big chance bumping into Belloq there.

101:27 Toht obviously isn’t bald, his head is clearly shaved. Why bother?

101:50 Nobody notices Indy, in the different coloured uniform, lurking all the way at the back of the parade?

102:02 Yikes, pointing the Panzerfaust at the Ark. That’s risky. But one wonders why Jones would do it in the first place if he wasn’t really willing to shoot. Not such a hot plan.

102:23 It always grosses me out when the fly crawls into Belloq’s mouth, but kudos to Paul Freeman for not letting it get to him in the slightest and continuing the scene. Yuck.

104:30 Okay, so they didn’t kill the prisoners. Sure. Makes sense.

105:34 Here’s where things really start to go bad for the Germans. First the generator blows, and then ghosts start coming out of the Ark. Wouldn’t YOU be running by now? Actually, I just notice, a couple do!

106:20 Why, exactly, does Indy instruct Marion not to look? I mean, he’s obviously right, but where does he get the idea from?

107:05 Toht screams like a girl. Heh.

107:20 Now the Nazis all get smoked at the same time, and faces start melting. This was probably one of the scariest scenes in a movie I’d ever seen in my life when I was young. Toht’s face dissolving haunted me for days, but was actually a brilliantly done special effect. Take that, CGI!