Mutant Reviewers from Hell do
"Everybody uses everybody, don't they?"

1983 PG / Dancing Drama Directed by: Sylvester Stallone Starring: John Travolta, Cynthia Rhodes, Finola Hughes

Tagline

Tony Manero knows the old days are over - But nobody's gonna tell him he can't feel that good again.

Summary Capsule

Ex-disco jockey lights up the spandex stage and breaks women's hearts everywhere

Mutant Meter

Movie Store [proceeds go toward monthly MRFH upkeep]

Amazon.com: DVD | Amazon.com: Soundtrack

Justin's Rating: I'm just a small town girl on a Saturday night, looking for the fight of my life

Justin's Review: 1978. Disco was all the craze, as was polyester lounge suits and butterfly collars. Saturday Night Fever rocked the world, and with it, the emerging career of Mr. John Travolta and John's chest hair patch. But what happened the day disco died and the calendar marched on to 1983? People got legwarmers and started leaping around doing electric ballet, that's what.

"Guys: the single tear rolling down her cheek means you've worn through her defenses!"

Travolta ("Tony") is quickly learning that making an honest living from dancing like a madcap fool is harder than the ads would have you believe. He's also depressed because he's rejected by Michael Ironside to be part of a Broadway dance chorus - every little boy's dream. That's okay, John. Michael rejects everybody. He proposed to his wife, she accepted, and then he rejected her acceptance. That's how it goes.

He then has a one night stand with a British dancer who kicks him out of the room after some sweet Scientology lovin'. This doesn't sit well, because he's John Travolta, and because it's a great excuse for him to go totally girly for the next half hour, pretending as if he never heard of "one night stands" and expects this chick to be his steady baby. Oh, and did I mention that on the side he's stringing along long-time faithful girlfriend Jackie as he does the nasty with this other girl? So he's got that to answer for in hell as well.

Ergo, you have a completely unsympathetic, two-timing, spandex-clad, bunny rabbit-leaping jerk for your protagonist. Everything else has to be sublime in comparison, yes? Definitely, as long as you're willing to overlook (a) anything remotely interesting happening in this movie, (b) dance scenes that seem like the cast members were filmed during an extreme truth or dare contest in which they had to dislocate limbs to win, and (c) the fact that the Bee Gees got a starring credit for their musical contributions to this movie.

Now, I'm not as much of a music buff as some, but the Bee Gees exhausted their credit the second a film exec used their most memorable disco song as the title of this film. The rest of their music sucks, heaves, blows, and rots. It's like an entire movie scored by the Lite FM.

Directed and written by Sly Stallone, Staying Alive is a testimony of bad sequels. It's not uncommon to watch this with the general thought that the filmmakers were deliberately making a quirky parody of all movies, ever. We're supposed to really care - deeply - about the love triangle between Tony, Jackie and British Chick. It makes it hard, then, when Jackie dumps Tony for cheating, and then rewards him by being his down-and-sweaty dancing partner until he acts slightly less of a toad and she takes him back. Guys: the single tear rolling down her cheek means you've worn through her defenses!

So what is this movie trying to say? I honestly have no idea. Is it a ballad to the mighty heroes of the early 80's Spandex Movement? The formula for Kyle's dating program? A two-hour Bee Gees music video? I need help. I need to leave this film, forever. Please, rescue me.

And now we know what John Travolta's greatest fantasy looks like "Good thing we have these here headbands! What with the sweat pouring down and all!" John vs. Catwoman

Didja Notice? [some sources: IMDb]

• Nothing says "badass" like starting your movie with ballet
• A room full of jumping, leaping, kicking people in spandex… scariest room to accidentally walk into? Yes.
• He does laundry in the shower while he's showering? Ew.
• That woman's hair makes her look like a vampirella
• I would be disturbed if some thin punk started dancing in a waiting room
• It's Frank Stallone… singing like a girl
• You can solve any relationship problem by dancing it out
• Sylvester Stallone bumps into Tony on the street.

Is It Worth Staying Through End Credits?

Egads, no.

Intermission! [some sources: IMDb]

Just like for the original, star John Travolta underwent extensive physical training for the role. The training was supervised by director Sylvester Stallone.

Rated #1 in Entertainment Weekly's Top 25 Worst Sequels Ever Made (2006).

Despite the negative reviews, it was a big success at the box office, earning almost $65 million dollars in the US. While the figure is signifacntly inferior to the $94 million earned from the original in 1977, it ranks among the top ten most successful films of 1983.

Groovy Quotes

Jackie: You know a woman's career as a dancer is half as long as a man's? So that means I have half as many chances of making it, right?

Laura: You say I used you but what about you using me? Everybody uses everybody, don't they?

Joy: Hello, Im Joy....
Tony Manero: ...And I'm happiness!

If you liked this movie, try these:

• Saturday Night Fever
• Flashdance
• Rocky