Mutant Reviewers from Hell do "Screamers"

Mutant Reviewers from Hell do

"Do you have a piano tied to your butt? Open the door."

1995 R / Scifi Horror
Directed by:
Christian Duguay
Starring:
Peter Weller, Roy Dupuis, Andrew Lauer
Tagline

The Last Scream You Hear Will Be Your Own.

Summary Capsule

War-weary soldiers bring the fight to little cute robotic killing machines.

Mutant Meter

Movie Store [proceeds go toward monthly MRFH upkeep]

DVD

Justin's Rating: You know, if I didn't have my coffee right now, I think I might be typing this sentence entirely backwards.
Justin's Review: When a movie has a great set-up, that can be worth the price of admission alone. Trust me, I’ve been suckered into many sub-par flicks that seem, by premise alone, to have it all going for them. If they end up being as great as the set-up, then it’s pure gold; if there’s a terrific set-up but a lousy execution, then there’s just a wistful (but not regretful) feeling of "what could have been." Screamers is one of those latter ones — the set-up is killer, with a different, interesting and mysterious setting for the movie. Too bad it just ends up being merely okay instead of cult genius.

"Unless you’ve recently inherited the brain of a semi-diseased camel named Yvonnie, there’s no getting past the fact that Screamers has some serious flaws."
Here’s the sitrep. It’s the vague future, and on a hotly contested mining planet, the lone survivors of a 10-year war are mostly cut off from each other and Earth, sitting on a stalemate of sorts. This stalemate is a result of a new weapon, nicknamed Screamers, which are little buzzsaw robots that burrow underground and attack any heartbeat not protected by the correct recognition codes. Mystery flourishes at Commander Hendricksson’s (RoboCop’s Peter Weller) base as a soldier from the other side shows up with a letter asking for a truce, a message comes in from Earth that the war is effectively over, and an unknown spaceship crash-lands carrying a nuclear reactor. What’s going on — is it a trick, or not? And how come the Screamers seem to sport a new upgrade? The only way to find out is to cross the Screamers-filled landscape to the other base and see what’s what.

For a small, low budget scifi film, Screamers impresses me with an intelligent plot and cool ideas, at least enough to have rewatched this a good half-dozen times since I first rented it. The planet itself and the situation is crucial to my affection. You really do get a feeling that this is a war-weary, desolate outpost far out of contact with shinier technology and crisper soldiers. As Hendrickson and his gang cross the radiation wastes, it settles in that this is the last days of a truly futile war, one that’s gone on longer than most people remember how it really started in the first place. Since this story is a close adaptation of a Philip K. Dick short story (an author who also gave us the source material for Blade Runner and Minority Report), there’s no mistaking this movie for one of its similar-looking but brain-dead cousins.

Quality dialogue springs forth on the journey between Hendrickson and new arrival Jefferson. "Quality dialogue" is my secret code for "hilariously strange". All you have to imagine is some sort of alternate universe Odd Couple show, with one of the fellows being a gruff, cranky military commander who yells at rocks that turn into bugs, and the other one being a dumb-as-a-bag-of-hammers jock who talks about making gourmet dishes a lot.

However, unless you’ve recently inherited the brain of a semi-diseased camel named Yvonnie, there’s no getting past the fact that Screamers has some serious flaws. Too many plot points are left unresolved, which is unfortunate considering how much this movie makes you want to know the truth. Not only that, but by the last third of the film, it becomes a second-rate Aliens/Terminator clone with natty special effects (kids at home, can you say "matte paintings" or "stop-motion animation"?). That’s where the wistfulness settles in right into the bones.

If you look at it as a movie — no kidding, of course that’s what it is — Screamers is destined to let you down. No sugar for you, daddy. But… but if you watch Screamers from the warped perspective of reading a short story put to moving pictures, then it’s quite intriguing. When it comes to science fiction, "intriguing" is a compliment.

The Perkins Family vacations to Salt Lake City

I do believe saluting like this in the Marines would get you horse-whipped

Wow, you future spacemen sure have nifty phone technology!

Didja Notice? [some sources: IMDb]