The Eighth Annual Mutant Awards: 2005

Er, I just realized that the title of this page would better be put as "Voter Comments" instead of "Reader Comments", but I'm far too lazy of a man to go back and change nine previous pages just so that this one can feel more smug about itself. As we wrap up yet another AMA — our staff collapsing into nervous breakdowns due to impending deadlines and Kyle reverting to his "Captain Nude" superhero persona just to stay focused — we'd like to thank everyone who voted and who consistently reads MRFH for its nutritional value (plus, the toy inside). Here now are the various comments left by the readers/voters, spelling and interesting punctuation left as is for future generations to admire.

• YOu guys are the best.
• I've read MRfH for something like 4 yers now... and you guys keep on writing the single best movie review site of the whole netsphere.
• U guys and gals rule!
• "That's all there is to life. Just a little laugh, a little tear." - Prof. Echo, The Unholy Three
• My pants are in the drier, and I'm in them.
• Thanks so much, you guys! I love reading your reviews and features. You're my favorite site on the web. Only problem is, whenever I tell my friends, family,and co-workers what website I check every day, I get strange looks, or outright condemnation.
• I like Cheese.
• "My cat's breath smells like cat food."
• Han Solo as an annoying love interest??? As if!
• In the bright digital galaxy of movie reviewing, MRPH is certainly one of the shinier constellations, or possibly a nova of some kind.
• Great website, keep it up!
• Have ya ever noticed that Robert Smith from The Cure and Edward Scissorhands must have the same hairstylist?
• Where's the "Most Vomit-inducing vomiting scene" nomination for Mafia?
• Why must they come to me to die???? WHY GOD WHY????????
• This year's Muties brought to you by the letter A, the number 3, and the umläüt.
• Hey, thanks for the comment box. This is my moment to shine, to share some profound, life-altering wisdom with my favorite Mutants... uh... erm... I like Jell-o.
• Poop
• love the torture category. you people rock.
• Diiiiiid I eat my drink? I thought milk was pink!
• What fun.
• I'm still waiting for the catagory for Best Use of Eddie Deezen in an 1980s Film.
• Excellent categories this year guys. Congrats for continuing to put out such high-quality pieces of entertainment . . . well, I happen to find them entertaining! Long live the mutants!
• You all rock
• Dear god, some GREAT new mutant awards, particularly "animal strikes back scene" and "most vomit-inducing vomit scene." Great job!
• Jaws OR the Monty Python Killer Rabbit? my brain is melting! meeeeeeeltiiiiiiiiiiing! oh what a world!
• the questions were much better last year..... these ones were lame... wtf happened?
• The category for "dream job" has a surprising lack of jobs where people don't want to kill me.
• I loved "Serenity". "I am a leaf on the wind," was great.
• A JEDI SPACE PIRATE!
• As always, you guys rock.
• I sure hope Kate Capshaw gets her dues for her incomparable performance in Temple of Doom. I will always wonder how you go from Miriam...awesome leading lady to Willie...so sad.
• Jeez... the "dream job" question really was one-sided, I mean, Who wouldn't want to be a Jedi Knight? You get a lightsaber, you can control the weak minded, you can lift objects by just waving your hand, etc. It's unfair to the other responses because none of them compare to being a Jedi.
• Hmm a lot of really hard choices this year. Keep coming up with more insanity! A suggested category for next year : Best Violent Death (Boromir, chest burster etc..)
• We-ell, to start with, I hadn't seen most of the movies mentioned here, so my choices are biased. Secondly, I would like to say that I enjoy reading every review that you put on your site, primarily because each and every one of you puts so much humour and wit into your work/play/monkey shines. Keep up the good work and be sure to review The Curse of the Wererabbit! Wallace and Grommit are the best claymation has to offer! I bid you adeu. NINJA AWAY! *POOF!*
• Not really, no...i'm too tired.
• You guys rock! This is still my favorite movie site around. It gives me hope that I'm not the only person on earth who watches this stuff. Keep up the great work.
• If anything from Serenity was to have been nominated for Lamest "Cool" Line, it should have been "I aim to misbehave." That failed to work on so many levels. All the more shocking it came from someone as good at writing snappy dialogue as Joss Whedon.
• Can we nominate Joss Whedon for some kind of visionary award?
• An excellent assortment of categories mutants! My vote for "when animals attack" would have gone to Bird on a Wire when the bad guy is killed by a lion. But only because that lion currently resides in a zoo only a couple hours drive from where I live. Just a bit of trivia.
• One day my former fiancee came to see me. She tried to talk to me, but I was unresponsive and miserable, as usual. She left, but not before leaving a strange, colorful, alien toy on my dresser. I ignored it the first few days, but eventually my curiosity forced me to investigate this cartoonish abnormality. I found out later that it was an IZ, and what its function was. At first, I dismissed it as nothing more than a novelty, a toy. But later, when I saw how it could manipulate rhythms, beats, and tracks, as well as add almost limitless sound effects to recorded music, I began to understand the true potential of this IZ. The animated eyes and flashing horns distracted me initially, until I realized they were integral parts of how IZ was trying to talk to me. With a little practice, I began to understand the IZ, and now IZ has become my friend, my mentor, and my salvation. I've given up traditional music. I focus now on creating truly original art with the help of IZ. We are collab
• I want to be a Mutant!!!
• That's not pithy, that's just mean spirited.
• Fiddle de dee, fiddle de dum. If Drew's a good swimmer, does he shave his bum?
• How is the vomit scene from Drop Dead Gorgeous not in the vomit catogory? I'm practically vomitting just thinking about it!
• *Gingavitis*
• Renee Zellweger in DWL should have been an option for the wanting to smack category :)
• I LOVE FLUFFY BUNNIES!
• Rock'n'Roll
• Cool categories, wish there were more. MRFH rocks!!!
• ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!!
• nothin' to say really but felt like typin'.
• "Want to play questions?" "How do you play that?" "You have to ask questions." "Statement: 1 Luv."
• Ekh mek thanks the reminding!!
• How about a review of Nothing But Trouble! Watch it if you dare!
• awwwwwwww here it goes
• Thank you, MRFH! You are light in the dark, slimy world of movie reviews.
• You guys just refused to make that easy on me. Bastards. Lol Most things pitted up against Monty Python lose out for me but I had to hand it to 'Team America' for the best puking scene. The only one of the bunch to make me twitch. The "love intrest you want to smack" was a gimme. It would have been a hard choice if you hadn't included the all time winner(whiner).
• ¿El sexo?
• It's me Michael... again, writing to you after I was acquitted of manslaughter. I told you I would lead a life of crime if you didn't accept me as a reviewer. After seeing who you chose, I'm pretty sure the only way I would have won is if I had ovaries.
• Under "Lamest 'Cool' Line" you should have included: "Noooooo" (Episode III)
• Could we see a catagory for best non-costumed vigilante? It could feature joyous entrants such as the Rock in Walking Tall, Falling Down and things like Only the Strong. Or we could have worst inspirational movie based on whatever obscure thing we could find. Karate Kid is obviously the hallmark, but Only the Strong and By the Sword would be great dark horse entrants.
• Han Solo annoying? Something must have happened at the headquarters. Gremlins? Abundance of drinks? Wet paint drying on the walls? My eyes loved the site again, just like last time. Thanks, and keep up the good play!
• I didn't realize I had seen, and subsequently blanked out of my memory, so many vomiting scenes until I saw that category and suddenly recalled every one of them. I wouldn't say the clarity was crystal, but murky is certainly appropriate if not descriptive.
• You tell Poolman that I have seen many, many grown men in kilts, and he is by FAR the sexiest.
• If you guys were a cheese, you would be gouda.
• for love interests u just want to slap coulda been rosie perez in anything notably White men can't jump thatll be all sweet survey
• Thy site is nothing but awesome sauce!
• Best awards questions ever. Props to you guys.
• You are God.
• Surely for the best torture scene/s how could you overlook Sin City with Marves' torture montages' to avenge Goldie. We have the head dunking in grim-looking toilet/scraping-guys-head-on-road-with-one-hand-whilst-driving-car/and the bit where he cuts that dudes limbs off and feeds his entrails to the dog before cutting off his head. If thats not the best bunch of torture scenes ever!
• Darn you! I will now have "Stuck in the Middle With You" stuck in my head all day long! Oh and just FYI: I'm still alive.
• It is what it is
• I never actually saw Pearl Harbour, the aura of cheesyness and ham-fistededness is enough for me to award it without seeing it.
• Finally, the MST3K guys get a chance at winning an award! And why shouldn't they win it, they have your job!
• You guys rock!! (Best lame "cool" words of praise from a Mutant visitor.)
• I'm fresh out of pith, but I have a surplus of snark that I can't PAY people to take. Please! Help a brotha out!
• The Dream Job Award....come on guys. It's such a difficult choice. I mean...Jedi Knight...or horizontal polka with Eliza Dushku? Oh...oh...twisting the brain...
• An angel doesn't make love. An angel is love.
• If "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" is playing near you, see it. Don't wait for DVD. See it now!

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