"It's like sitting in your basement, watching those weird movies with your friends" -- this was the original vision for Mutant Reviewers. For over 11 years, our crack staff of writers have put themselves through a gauntlet of some of the best and worst cult flicks in the world, all for the sake of research, entertainment and bragging rights.
This is our story.
The Scoop: 2008 R, directed by Lexi Alexander, and starring Ray Stevenson, Dominic West and Julie Benz.
Tagline: Vengeance has a name.
Summary Capsule: Ex-Special Forces instructor–not FBI agent–living in New York–not Miami–turns blood-soaked vigilante after his family is murdered by the mob. Chunks ensue.
I’m a sap. I’ve said it before, numerous times, but making me cry at movies is often like shooting fish in a barrel, at least the first time through. And I love it.
Interestingly, it’s not always the sad moments that make me cry. I wrote this list before I wrote the introduction, and only three are officially truly sad moments. The other seven are bittersweet, some even more sweet than bitter. A few are even downright happy (well, by tearjerker standards). What can I say? Strong emotion makes me cry.
So, my ten moments I cry, no matter how many times I’ve seen the movie (and with #7, that one feels like it’s the triple digits.)
Actually, I think there may only be five total, so I guess that kind of takes the special out of it.
Bah! Whatever! Titles that work are just as lame as well though-out introductions! Let’s do this!
Oh, I will pause to mention that you are strongly encouraged to read first, and then decide whether or not you want to view. MRFH and its affiliates, subsidiaries and shadow governments are not responsible for any puking or nightmares that may result.
“It’s just like the first time I came here, isn’t it? We were talking about automobile insurance, only you were thinking about murder. And I was thinking about that anklet.”
The Scoop: 1944, Unrated, Directed by Billy Wilder and starring Fred MacMurray, Barbara Stanwyck, and Edward G. Robinson
Tagline: It’s Love And Murder At First Sight!
Summary Capsule: An insurance salesman with a taste for someone else’s wife gets mixed up with a rotten dame that might be the death of him.
”’I don’t care who’s fault it is; his, hers, or the milkman’s. If one of them comes to me, it means they’re both miserable. That’s my job-putting people out of their misery.“
The Scoop: 1990 R, directed by Jack Nicholson and starring Jack Nicholson and Harvey Keitel.
Tagline: They say money makes the world go round. But sex was invented before money.
Summary Capsule: The unloved little brother of Chinatown throws JJ Gittes into a world of money, murder, and mineral rights as the ghosts of his past come back to haunt him.